The Great Wasabi Oyster Duel
When I challenged Sally from Unbrave Girl to a wasabi oyster duel in a seafood shack in Vung Tau, I didn’t let on that it was going to be my first time as a competitor in any type of duel.
I had witnessed many wasabi oyster duels between Darling Man and his crazy friends. Watching a wasabi reaction is very entertaining, especially when both spectators and participants have had a few beers.
But I don’t like oysters.
And Sally claims to be unbrave, so I was sure challenging her to anything would mean she’d wimp out.
Er, apparently not.
She said she liked oysters and wasabi and so was game.
I figured I’d just nominate Darling Man as my stand-in and that would be that.
But when the oysters were delivered, I decided I just could not be a chicken. Not when the other competitor is supposedly unbrave.
“I’m not unbrave when it comes to eating,” she told me in an offhand manner as she chugged a beer and Darling Man prepared two tiny dipping bowls of wasabi and soy sauce.
The oysters were prised out of their shells, dropped into the potent dipping sauce and left to marinade for a while.
Darling Man went first, gallantly eating half my wasabi oyster. He went red, tears rolled down his cheeks and he gasped for air. It was hilarious. And I forgot to take pictures.
Sally went next. She went red, tears rolled down her cheeks, she gasped for air and flapped her hands about. It was hilarious. Darling Man took pictures of it on Sally’s camera.
I went last.
When the wasabi vapours reached the delicate tissues of my sinuses, I went red, my eyes filled with tears and I squeezed a napkin so hard a few drops of water came out.
Judging by how the spectators reacted, it was hilarious.
From my perspective, getting that slippery bugger down was just a huge relief. I couldn’t even taste the oyster. Only wasabi.
The afterglow was so good I had another one.
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5 years ago